New
Yet still feeling continued.
The cold starting to make a move
The new breaks
The new light.
A lousy feeling overcoming me
Things aren't new
Things are the same
Sure let the ball drop
At the strike of midnight
Strummed out
High as a kite
Never wanting to come down
Unlike that glimmering ball.
The city wasn't freezing
A new sensation
With an old surrounding
January.

Left.

You were there ever since I was born
Didn't realize you were there till I was 3
I was standing the mirror disgusted.
I'm always scared you'd be seen
Before I get to explore a world
A new world.
It has been revealed in the smelly locker room
Where insecurities and poor self esteem
Make up the stench.

Here I am embarrassed of you.

I expect the least from you.

Usually I am optimistic towards people and I'm quite generous with hospitality and all that nice stuff but you? TUH! 

Maybe it's all out of wanting to be secure.

I'm sorry.

If I were to be an introvert for a while

I wouldn't have as many conversations I would have today. The majority of my friends wouldn't even fucking bother. Sometimes I feel that I put too much effort into a friendship I put 3/4 and my friends put 1/4 it's either that or I'm "unappreciative". Ha whatever I know I should be apathetic about this but it sucks.  

I'm terrible.

Sometimes I have the biggest urge to do specific things out of spite. I absolutely am terrible, Merry Christmas.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.1

Christmas Eve

I feel like being a fun sponge.
I wanna cry and be alone.
I'm being too dramatic
But this is how I feel.
I"m far from happy.
Bitter
Sad
Cold.